I love hangin’ out at the old folk’s home. There, I’m the youngest. The prettiest. The smartest. And the most continent.
I fit in real well with the residents, probably because they get to do all the stuff I like to do. Puzzles and games. Arts and crafts. Singing, although I’m not very good at that. But then none of them are either. At least I can remember the words…most the time.
They also eat lots of cake and ice cream. I really like that part.
The old-timers get to take lots of naps too. They take ‘em before breakfast, after breakfast, before lunch, after lunch, before dinner, after dinner. During dinner. And before bedtime. The minute an old geezer climbs out of his or her bed, an aide makes it up again. It’s sort of like being on a cruise ship, only without the towel animals.
And without the shuffleboard.
It costs about the same, though.
You know, old age sounds almost good when it you put it that way. I could handle a cruise ship kinda life with lots of naps.
ReplyDelete-FringeGirl
Is there bingo? Debbie
ReplyDeleteI love when you write about something, tell a story. It's always a treat to read. Good exercise for a writer... ~PJ
ReplyDeleteI have told my kids that I'm not going to a "old folks home". I told them just to put me on a cruise ship and I'll just cruise my life away. I mean you have a doctor on board, all the food you can eat, someone to attend to your every need or want and you get to see some beautiful places.
ReplyDeleteMy parents were in an "old folks" home and then after my mom died,my dad got put in the Alzheimer section. OMG is all I can say. I had lunch with all of them one day. Because it was SO insane, I suddenly found great humor in it. And I'm with you, doesn't it make you feel a hell of alot younger!
ReplyDeleteTake care, Sue
Your butt is a reasonable size (for a gal your age), so don't refer to yourself as a continent.
ReplyDeleteNow I'm thinking you had a good idea when you
asked me to pre-read that 'thoughtful' essay
about the hot tub incident.
oh, sorry, sorry, sorry....you meant the most
ReplyDeletecontinent as opposed to incontinent! I jumped the gun.
Don't know who Anonymous is, but he/she/it is damn funny!
ReplyDeleteTell me...do you see any sexual escapades going on there? And do they have happy hour? Those are my two most pressing questions? Getting a little anxious about my future.
Malisa
At my age, I'm thinking about the cruise thing. Like you said, it's the same cost and they will take care of me.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I used to volunteer in a nursing home, and you make it sound a lot more attractive than I remember. But then, is an "old folks home" different than a nursing home?