Friday, June 5, 2009

Neck and neck...and more neck!

Just as a woman’s shoes reveal her financial situation, her neck tells her true age. So I was shocked the other day to look in a mirror and see that my neck had aged faster than the rest of my body.

I have more chins than Chinatown. My throat alone could make enough giblet gravy to feed all of Bryan at Thanksgiving. And I could make a medium sized lampshade from the excess skin. I think you get the picture.

My. Neck. Is. Old! How did this happen? When did this happen? More importantly, what can I do about it?

Plastic surgery is out. Too painful as well as too expensive. It costs an arm and a leg, which, by the way, are still lookin’ good! I don’t want to be tradin’ away parts of me that still are fairly attractive.

I could, I guess, wear turtlenecks all year long, but then again it gets pretty hot here in Texas during the summer. Sometimes during the winter too.

I thought about scarves at the neck, but then I remembered how silly Candice Bergman looked doing that. It’s one thing to get old and another to get ridiculous!

The answer to my dilemma came walking into class Thursday.

With a higher neckline and a gender switch, I think Don's T-shirt could be the answer to my neck problem!

In fact, the answer to several problems!


  1. If I ever got a face lift, the doc would have to start at the knees and pull UP...then guess what I'd be wearing for earrings?
    Talk about a man with self assurance. No body image problems there!

  2. ok...but not in public right?


  3. Oh can I have one that covers my face too? Although I've heard that Life Lift isn't too bad. I'm just sayin.

  4. he's kinda cute.... what did you say his name was?

  5. Just embrace it all!! I know I hate soooo many things too,(yes, very vain)but I am trying to think just get healthy. Because at this name of the game healthy will hopefully be the pay off.

  6. Life's too short! I say enjoy whatcha got left that's good, and find some way to not forget whatcha "used" to have, and forget the rest! Karen

  7. I should have known! You are getting up early and going down to the pool to ogle the body-building men! Nice ass Don has!

    Girl, you don't worry about your neck! Yous a beautiful woman! I inherited this lovely double chin which I have even when I'm skinny. I think I can remember that far back. Just gotta live with it cause it ain't going nowhere!


  8. That's hilarious! I had the female version of the shirt when I was in my twenties. I've never seen the male version though. Too funny!

    Lynnette Labelle

  9. I'm having a giveaway... check it out!

  10. Funny post Cher but I know what you're talking about!


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